Dark Angel Keep Our Secrets Funny Wargaming Sci-Fi Tee Hobbit Parody

Some secrets are better left buried. Preferably somewhere beneath a cozy hillside home where nobody thinks to look.

This tee brings together grimdark tabletop energy and peaceful fantasy countryside charm in one wonderfully ridiculous mashup. A brooding, battle-worn knight stands guard over an idyllic little village, complete with rolling green hills, flowers, and a suspiciously familiar-looking signpost. The distressed artwork and parchment-style lettering give the design a vintage fantasy feel, while the line “All right then, we’ll keep our secrets.” delivers the joke.

It’s made for tabletop gamers, miniature painters, fantasy fans, and anyone who appreciates the absurdity of dropping an enormous armored warrior into the most peaceful place imaginable.

Wear it to game night, conventions, the hobby shop, or while spending six hours painting a miniature you confidently told everyone would take twenty minutes.

Product features

• Soft, comfortable everyday graphic tee
• Detailed vintage-inspired fantasy artwork
• Classic fit that works well for casual wear or game nights
• Designed for tabletop, miniature-hobby, and fantasy fans
• A fun gift for the gamer who definitely knows some things—and definitely isn’t telling

Crafted Goods for Timeless Stories.

Product information: Gildan 5000, 2 year warranty in EU and Northern Ireland as per Directive 1999/44/EC

Warnings, Hazard: For adults, Made in Nicaragua

Care instructions: Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F), Non-chlorine: bleach as needed, Tumble dry: low heat, Do not iron, Do not dryclean